THE 10 POWERS OF NEGOTIATION...
For any entrepreneur, executive or professional, negotiating skills and moral authority can be the difference between success and failure not just in business generally, but also in detecting a looming scam. During his historic negotiations with the apartheid government, Nelson Mandela showcased his profound negotiating skills, moral authority, remarkable courage and ability to resist the intimidation and hubris of those he faced. In researching those historic negotiations and his skills for my book, Detecting the Scam: Nelson Mandela's Gift, I identified ten beacons of knowledge or "powers" of negotiation he had mastered. I called them "The 10 Powers of Negotiation."
As I negotiated agreements around the world for over 30 years, I noticed a recurring trend. I noticed how someone approached these Powers often reflected his or her personality and their approach to business and life in general. In this respect, the negotiating process resembled a "magical window" through which you could look to see how the other side is likely to treat you once the negotiations and the deal is done. I also noticed that scams were really negotiating duels between scammers and their marks.
THE 10 POWERS THAT OFFER THE MAGICAL WINDOW?
* The power of understanding that a negotiation is a process;
* The power of preparation;
* The power of positioning;
* The power of common sense and logic;
* The power of dignity, congeniality, humility and humor;
* The power of truth and fairness;
* The power of observation - of listening and seeing;
* The power of morality, courage and attitude;
* The power of patience; and
* The power to walk away.
SOMETHING ABOUT A NEGOTIATION YOU CAN TAKE TO THE BANK...
Whether you are looking at a negotiation or at anything else, most people never behave better than when they want something from you. So, if they behave unreasonably in a negotiation, or if they haven't done their homework or are unprofessional, or if they appear to be skirting ethical borders, or just have a bad attitude, my experience is that you can expect no better from them after the negotiation is done - after they have what they want. The converse, however, is also true: If they behave reasonably and professionally with a collaborative spirit during the negotiation, there is the reasonable possibility they might act in the same way after the ink on your agreement has dried. It is in this sense that a negotiation is a magical window into the future - for both sides...
THINK ABOUT HELPING THE OTHER GUYS...
Why not reach out to the other side and reassure them that you are acting in good faith? This will always help create a working relationship with them that will help you reach your goals.
One approach I have used is to begin a negotiation by telling the other side about this concept of a negotiation being a magical window into the future. By doing so, I'm effectively inviting them to show me what it might be like to do business with them after we have reached agreement. I will then explain how we intend to approach the negotiation process:
"We won't ask you for anything we wouldn't accept ourselves if we were in your place. It would be nice if you used the same approach, you don't have to. If you ask us for something you would never accept in our position, we'll ask you to explain why you think your request is reasonable. If you can't, this will make trust between us difficult. And without trust, this process will become quite difficult."
If they ignore us and still ask for something unreasonable and if they demand we act immediately without giving us a chance to think about what they're pitching us, we have to accept a reality: We may be dealing with someone we can't trust. We may be dealing with a scammer...
REMEMBER THEY ARE WATCHING US AS WE ARE WATCHING THEM...
A word of caution: The other side are looking at us through that magic window just as we are looking at them. They too are looking for signs of how we might treat them after a deal is done.
As we are watched, what do we want them to see? We want them to see us as reasonable, well-prepared professionals who conduct ourselves with humility, but without taking ourselves too seriously. We want them to know we understand their position and the problems they face. We want them to see us as being logical and displaying common sense. We want them to see us as collaborative partners in the problem-solving process. We want them to have a sense of our morality, ethics and fairness and that doing business with us will be a pleasure and might even justify them offering us the concessions we are requesting.
THE 10 POWERS...
How we specifically apply the 10 Powers of Negotiation is to understand that a negotiation is neither a battle nor a war. Instead, it is a multi-layered and nuanced problem-solving process that requires both sides to understand the problems they face and that they need solved.
To apply the 10 Powers, therefore, will require us to be able to walk and chew gum at the same time while also holding more than a single thought in our head. Unless we can do this, we are in for a rough time as we face a skilled negotiator. Clearly, unless we have the ability to collaborate and unless we are a problem-solver, we face the unhappy prospect of having to push a very heavy rock up a quite steep hill. More about that in future articles...
But, as we prepare ourselves for this, we should never lose sight of that magical window, which we should always look through with great interest.
For any entrepreneur, executive or professional, negotiating skills and moral authority can be the difference between success and failure not just in business generally, but also in detecting a looming scam. During his historic negotiations with the apartheid government, Nelson Mandela showcased his profound negotiating skills, moral authority, remarkable courage and ability to resist the intimidation and hubris of those he faced. In researching those historic negotiations and his skills for my book, Detecting the Scam: Nelson Mandela's Gift, I identified ten beacons of knowledge or "powers" of negotiation he had mastered. I called them "The 10 Powers of Negotiation."
As I negotiated agreements around the world for over 30 years, I noticed a recurring trend. I noticed how someone approached these Powers often reflected his or her personality and their approach to business and life in general. In this respect, the negotiating process resembled a "magical window" through which you could look to see how the other side is likely to treat you once the negotiations and the deal is done. I also noticed that scams were really negotiating duels between scammers and their marks.
THE 10 POWERS THAT OFFER THE MAGICAL WINDOW?
* The power of understanding that a negotiation is a process;
* The power of preparation;
* The power of positioning;
* The power of common sense and logic;
* The power of dignity, congeniality, humility and humor;
* The power of truth and fairness;
* The power of observation - of listening and seeing;
* The power of morality, courage and attitude;
* The power of patience; and
* The power to walk away.
SOMETHING ABOUT A NEGOTIATION YOU CAN TAKE TO THE BANK...
Whether you are looking at a negotiation or at anything else, most people never behave better than when they want something from you. So, if they behave unreasonably in a negotiation, or if they haven't done their homework or are unprofessional, or if they appear to be skirting ethical borders, or just have a bad attitude, my experience is that you can expect no better from them after the negotiation is done - after they have what they want. The converse, however, is also true: If they behave reasonably and professionally with a collaborative spirit during the negotiation, there is the reasonable possibility they might act in the same way after the ink on your agreement has dried. It is in this sense that a negotiation is a magical window into the future - for both sides...
THINK ABOUT HELPING THE OTHER GUYS...
Why not reach out to the other side and reassure them that you are acting in good faith? This will always help create a working relationship with them that will help you reach your goals.
One approach I have used is to begin a negotiation by telling the other side about this concept of a negotiation being a magical window into the future. By doing so, I'm effectively inviting them to show me what it might be like to do business with them after we have reached agreement. I will then explain how we intend to approach the negotiation process:
"We won't ask you for anything we wouldn't accept ourselves if we were in your place. It would be nice if you used the same approach, you don't have to. If you ask us for something you would never accept in our position, we'll ask you to explain why you think your request is reasonable. If you can't, this will make trust between us difficult. And without trust, this process will become quite difficult."
If they ignore us and still ask for something unreasonable and if they demand we act immediately without giving us a chance to think about what they're pitching us, we have to accept a reality: We may be dealing with someone we can't trust. We may be dealing with a scammer...
REMEMBER THEY ARE WATCHING US AS WE ARE WATCHING THEM...
A word of caution: The other side are looking at us through that magic window just as we are looking at them. They too are looking for signs of how we might treat them after a deal is done.
As we are watched, what do we want them to see? We want them to see us as reasonable, well-prepared professionals who conduct ourselves with humility, but without taking ourselves too seriously. We want them to know we understand their position and the problems they face. We want them to see us as being logical and displaying common sense. We want them to see us as collaborative partners in the problem-solving process. We want them to have a sense of our morality, ethics and fairness and that doing business with us will be a pleasure and might even justify them offering us the concessions we are requesting.
THE 10 POWERS...
How we specifically apply the 10 Powers of Negotiation is to understand that a negotiation is neither a battle nor a war. Instead, it is a multi-layered and nuanced problem-solving process that requires both sides to understand the problems they face and that they need solved.
To apply the 10 Powers, therefore, will require us to be able to walk and chew gum at the same time while also holding more than a single thought in our head. Unless we can do this, we are in for a rough time as we face a skilled negotiator. Clearly, unless we have the ability to collaborate and unless we are a problem-solver, we face the unhappy prospect of having to push a very heavy rock up a quite steep hill. More about that in future articles...
But, as we prepare ourselves for this, we should never lose sight of that magical window, which we should always look through with great interest.
About the Author:
Learn about how to detect scams using Nelson Mandela's negotiating skills. Learn too about his relevance today. In his critically acclaimed book, Michael Friedlander tracks Mandela's skills and applies them to modern scams such as the Enron adventure and the Bernard Madoff Ponzi scheme.
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